moby dick

I love catching students in their lies. Next to reading love notes left in my room after class, catching student's in their lies is a favorite past time. Don't get me wrong; I don't condone lying to a teacher...especially with a bad lie...but I think it's great how they think I'm dumb and don't see right past their sneaky ways. Here's my new favorite student-caught-in-a-lie example, just from today!

Each month my students turn in a reading log...they have to read 20 minute each day we are at school (so reading on the weekends is not necessary). I think I make it pretty easy for them, allowing them to count reading in their advisory class or reading to younger siblings. Each month, without fail, I have several who never turn their logs in, resulting in failing grades. Today someone turned one in---four days late---filled in all the way. I check to see the days they read, the book, author, and time they spent reading. This brainiac of a student had put on his paper that he had read the book "Moby Dick," which in and of itself is a lofty task for an 8th grader who reads on the 3rd grade level. The thing that caught my eye (in other words, his lie) was the name he wrote the author's section: Mark Twain. What? Really? Yeah, I maybe I've missed something, but last time I checked, I did major in English and I did read lots and lots of Twain and I'm fairly sure he didn't write "Moby Dick." I quickly caught the mistake, walked up to this student and said, "Let me see your copy of "Moby Dick." He said 'what?' (really the second indicator that he had not in fact read of Ahab's ship) and I responded, "Because according to your reading log, Mark Twain wrote "Moby Dick" and I just want to make sure that you read the same version of "Moby Dick" that I've read." He was dumbfounded: "Huh?" Then I broke the bad news...yup, see, you can't fool the English teacher on famous books and authors. (Later on today, I had another student turn in her reading log. This month's book selection for her: Harry Potter. The author? Jay Kay Rolling. Come on, kids, if you're gonna cheat, at least make it look real, eh??)

I was caught in yet another fight yesterday. Two kids in my 7th period had been verbally going at it all during class. After so many f-bombs, I handed out ASD's to the perpetrators and I felt I had solved the problem. Then, close to the end of class, one student said something to the affect of "Bring it on" to which the other replied, "ok, after school." Luckily my ears were turned on and caught their conversation. An outsider recommended that they meet in the bathroom to take care of business in private, yet again, I heard. I walked up to them shortly after this and tried to keep in between them. I had another student call me to answer a question, so I was then distracted. The next thing I knew, the bell had rung, and the two boys were having a full on boxing match right there on my floor! Punches left and right, blood on the ground, the whole yadda yadda. I quickly ran up to them, stepped in front of one of the boys, got hit in the shoulder and grabbed one of the kids shirts. Another student grabbed the other and we headed down to the office. The two fighters were suspended from school for the remainder of the week. Hallelujah.

I'm out of school tomorrow and Friday; more training workshops. The sub I have arranged will take both days. Luckily tomorrow the counselor's are coming in to do registration for next year with the students. Already I've had a plethora of students sign up for yearbook/journalism...but my next step will be to weed out the students whose English teachers tell me they might not be a good fit for the program. I can't believe we're already thinking about next year!!